My Sixteenth Post.
It’s hard to explain my thoughts right now… I’m not exactly sure what to think. My brain tells me one thing, my instincts tell me another. My heart is strangely quiet.
Have I become numb?
I’m kind of in a predicament. I’d like to talk it over with someone, someone who knows me, knows how I work, and knows how I’m most likely feeling, whether I believe it or not…
I only know two people like that.
But I can’t discuss it with them.
Yes… You are one of them.
But… I refuse to bring this to you. This isn’t your problem, and really, it’d be kind of fucked up for me to bring it to you.
The other one… Well… You and I both know how that’s gonna work out. I’m trying to avoid her as much as possible.
I just really wish I knew how to sort shit out. I suppose I’ll wait for this weekend… I think it’ll tell me everything I need to know…
I hope.
But I know that, usually, when I go looking for answers, I just end up with more questions.
What the good, righteous fuck…
Just when you think the inner war is over, it renews with a stupendous amount of ferocity.
