January 2012
2 posts
I know.
That you still read this.
How about you just talk to me instead?
I have so much to say to you. So many things.
I want to yell at you, and be angry, and be irrational, ignorant and malevolent.
I want you to finally see me angry.
Maybe that’ll be enough to convince you.
Doubtful, though.
Intermission.
I feel like I don’t want to live anymore.
December 2011
6 posts
There are a LOT of things...
… That I wish I wasn’t right about.
Bad Habit.
I’ve gotten into a pretty bad habit.
Scoffing at people who think they’re “in true love”.
Recite all the quotes and anecdotes you’d like about what “true love” is. Ignore the many bad qualities for the few good.
Mistake infatuation and attachment for love.
But don’t fucking patronize me by saying I’ll find a “love” as true as...
My Twenty Fifth (and the other half) Post.
To you, the whole “half” thing is probably pointless.
But this isn’t about you.
Selfish.
Anyways, I’ve been thinking about writing here again because I have things that I want to write about.
Why else would I be doing this?
I found a job. Not as a bartender, like I was hoping, but as a barback. Close, but no cigar with that Green label Walker. Then again, everyone has...
My Twenty Fifth (and a half) Post.
A quick hello to the people who are undoubtedly reading this in some attempt to “check up on me”.
It’s alright. I honestly don’t mind. However, I would rather that the topics discussed in these posts remain in these posts. I give you guys the benefit of never letting you know that I know what you don’t think ANYONE knows. I know what it’s like to need to get...
I believe in you.
You’ll make it through this.
Keep your head up.
Don’t give up.
It's Ridiculous...
Even though the mere thought of you flares my temper…
The fact that you’re being unjustly villainized by that guy who lost all the respect he Gaines from me, surprisingly, makes me want to stand up for you.
Then again, you pretty much did the same to me…
Hmm… A dilemma, indeed.
Maybe I should quit creepin’ when I’m bored…
And if you’re reading...
November 2011
3 posts
Haha
I’m a fucking waste. I’m a fucking nightmare that you can’t wake up from. I’m in a fucking slump. What’s your fucking excuse? You think I’m here to lead you to good times and great advice? Fuck that and fuck you. I’m dead. I’m dead and no one here realizes it. Did you think shit was gonna magically work the way you wanted it to? Did you think that...
When I Finally Explode...
It’s gonna be something magnificent. Until then, for one night, I’m giving up all hope on everything. Fuck my problems and fuck the world. I’m getting drunk.
October 2011
6 posts
Doesn't it suck?
When you feel like crying, but there are no tears left?
Everything seems broken. I can’t be diffusing bombs in public, during broad daylight. Never rely on me, because I’ll just let you down. Never mold your world around one or two people. In the end, you’re alone. In the end, you’ll have nothing but yourself. Its a cold, hard truth, but its still the truth.
What the FUCK
Is wrong with me?
My Twenty Fourth Post
I’m becoming nocturnal once more. Every night it gets harder and harder to will myself to sleep. I’m pretty sure that eventually, I’ll get to the point where I’m sleeping less and less. It’s almost that time of year, that time where my brain chemistry decides to go haywire.
It’s only a matter of time until this page is filled with more pointless posts relating...
I Suppose...
… You should just treat me like that piece of shit that gets stuck to your shoe. You look down, curse at yourself for coming into contact with me, scrape me off and keep on walking.
Really?
Do you have to be a bitch, all the time, for no reason? Get a fucking life, preferably one that doesn’t coincide with mine. I don’t wish you dead, I just simply never want to see you again. I wish you’d do us both a favor and understand that.
September 2011
6 posts
Intermission.
I’m tired of trying to explain myself…
I wish people would stop asking me questions, then not even understand the answer… It’s a waste of my time, and theirs. Time that could be better spent doing something productive, emotionally, or physically.
The answer is so much, I don’t even know where to begin.
Fucking a.
You know...
They’re not gonna leave you alone, right? At least, he won’t.
I’ve got my money on her hating you before the year is up.
Of course you won’t know anything about it.
She’s a two-faced bitch like that.
Sorry if this sounds cold, but it’s the truth.
Also, if I have certain Rogues reading this, all I gotta say is…
Get off my nuts, figuratively.
Because...
5 tags
mrscheshireatyourservice:
tlyudacris:
edwardnygma:
More like HomeSUCK
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
bahahaha *snort*
This is it.
I need out.
I never thought that I would want out of this place THIS badly… I can’t stand to see the people that I grew up with, turning on each other, hating each other. And then expecting me to take sides.
Don’t these people know that I don’t care? I don’t care about the shit they go through with others. I don’t care about what you THINK I should do.
I...
I’m an idiot.
‘Nuff said.
Its that moment...
When you realize, maybe everything isn’t as fucked up as you thought it was…
Maybe things could actually be ok…
Maybe people are actually understanding, and will listen to the message you’ve tried so desperately to scribble down on whatever visible surface you could find.
That moment when everything lines up, the way it was undoubtedly meant to be.
The moment where the...
August 2011
3 posts
To think the world would stop for us is a ridiculous notion…
You could fade away into history, and after a century, people wouldn’t even notice.
In the grand scheme of things, our lives are minute instances.
Compared to the universe, we are small and insignificant.
But those nights that we spent huddled together, looking at the stars, feeling the warmth of our bodies radiating from...
Intermission.
Today is just one of those days where I feel like I’ll never be able to improve at anything past my current level.
I suck.
...
I’m really going to miss you…
July 2011
2 posts
My Twenty Third Post
Life has been pretty hectic.
All my issues seem like they’re building up on me, and while I usually do well under pressure, I honestly feel close to caving in.
It’s ridiculous how fast your life can change.
It’s downright disturbing how little decisions you never thought to make, end up cracking your life down to shambles.
I suppose that’s the butterfly effect at work.
...
Intermission.
I’m not sure where my life is headed… I don’t know if I’ll even be able to handle it…
Swimming seems hard to do… But I guess I have to. The problem is… What am I supposed to be swimming towards..?
This life feels like an oil tanker… Its taking on water, fast…
June 2011
1 post
Wow.
I thought you were done being stupid.
Guess I was wrong.
May 2011
1 post
Intermission.
Yeah… If I were able to have feelings… I’m sure they’d be for you.
April 2011
6 posts
Fuck...
Not even sex will do it for me anymore.
Meh.
Intermission.
Fucking dandy.
My Twenty-Second Post.
You know, it’s times like this, that I wish I could be the old, sensitive me…
I feel like I can’t trust anyone with my heart, or my genuine feelings. Well, no one besides my closest friends.
But I’m talking about females, I suppose. Girls that have the possibility for being candidates for a future relationship.
I wonder if I’m broken…
See, I’d like a...
Intermission.
Why exactly does it seem like I want a relationship, suddenly?
Meh.
My Twenty-First post.
If I had to sum up my events from yesterday in one word, it would be this:
Fail.
It was a pretty hard fail, too.
There’s this chick, that works at this place…
Every time I go in there, I get the feeling she stares at me. I’ve even brought it up to people that go in the store with me. They also agreed that she seemed to be staring at me. This was exacerbated by my best friend,...
Intermission.
You know what sucks?
People are so quick to assume I’m just a bullshitter or a shit head.
Fuck.
I miss my desensitized state.
March 2011
2 posts
My Twentieth Post.
Did I know what yesterday was?
In all honesty, it slipped my mind.
But can you blame me?
If it were all that important to you, don’t you think it would have garnered SOME kind of communication?
You have all the time in the world to spend with them, and to re-patch your friendship with him, but none to drop me a line?
I hate how this turned out…
… But I refuse to be your...
Good Luck
Trying to find me again.
Dueces.
February 2011
5 posts
My Nineteenth Post.
I had a dream…
I was driving. My foot was flooring the pedal, and the road ahead of me started to thin…
At the end of the road, they split into two directions, left and right.
I never even touched the brake.
I didn’t budge the wheel.
I went careening over a ledge, and below me, a waterfall… It reflected jade and sapphire against the rocky cliff it spewed from…
...
Intermission.
Phone was dead for the whole weekend.
Just turned it on, after charging it, and I got 11 text messages.
9 were my automated bank statements.
The other two?
Drunkenly sent from my friend, whom I spent the entire weekend with.
I’m no longer waiting to do this in person.
I’ll fucking mail her a letter if I have to.
My Eighteenth Post.
I think I’m fed up with this life…
… And some of the people in it.
I wake up to drive an hour, to work a job that only recognizes imperfections, in order to get money to pay bills that magically keep stacking up on me.
Nothing is going right.
Nothing is going as planned.
It’s affecting my mood. I’ve been a complete asshole all day today. I’ve made plans to...
Intermission.
Relax…
Take a deep breath…
Don’t let it go on like this…
It’s not fair to either of us.
Fuck, this is gonna hurt…
My Seventeenth Post.
I know how I should be feeling right now.
I know I should feel guilty, I should feel like an asshole, I should feel horrible…
But I don’t.
This just seems like another chore I have to do.
Clean car? Check.
Do laundry? Check.
Break off a near one-year relationship? I’ll get around to it.
I don’t feel anything. Which begs the question…
Have I changed for the...
January 2011
5 posts
My Sixteenth Post.
It’s hard to explain my thoughts right now… I’m not exactly sure what to think. My brain tells me one thing, my instincts tell me another. My heart is strangely quiet.
Have I become numb?
I’m kind of in a predicament. I’d like to talk it over with someone, someone who knows me, knows how I work, and knows how I’m most likely feeling, whether I believe it or...
My Fifteenth Post.
All I have to say is…
What the good, righteous fuck?
Why..?
I have a new follower..?
Strange.
Sup?
December 2010
2 posts
My Fourteenth Post, Because Thirteen Is An Unlucky...
Ahh… The subject of Luck.
See, I believe that, if life were more like an RPG, my luck skill would be in the negatives.
Actually, I could map out my skills for you through a medium known as the S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Attribute set, derived from the game Fallout.
S - 4
P - 6
E - 3
C - 8
I - 8
A - 2
L - -99999
Yeah, its that bad. Some people may argue that it can’t be my luck...
Reblog if you want (1) message saying what someone...
-insertxcatchyxtitlexhere-:
azaneth:
mirandamichele1129:
;) these never work though. my messages always = 0 :(
this is cute! :]
please??? :]
Hmm.